How to write good.....(for ShawnD.)

[spinedocab]

A friend who knows my preference for well written words sent this to me and I simply have no choice other than sharing with Shawn D. et al. Enjoy.

>HOW TO WRITE GOOD (Source Unknown)
> >
> >
> >Verb has to agree with their subjects.
> >
> >Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
> >
> >And don't start a sentence with a conjuction.
> >
> >It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
> >
> >Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat)
> >
> >Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
> >
> >Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
> >
> >Be more or less specific.
> >
> >Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
> >
> >No sentence fragments.
> >
> >Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.
> >
> >Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
> >
> >Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly
> >superfluous.
> >
> >One should never generalize.
> >
> >Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
> >
> >Don't use no double negatives.
> >
> >Eshew ampersands & abreviations, etc.
> >
> >One-word sentences? Eliminate.
> >
> >Analogies in writing are like feather on a snake.
> >
> >The passive voice is to be avoided
> >
> >Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however
> >should be enclosed in commas.
> >
> >Never use a big word when a diminutive one will suffice.
> >
> >Kill all exclamation points!!!
> >
> >Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
> >
> >Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earthshaking
> >ideas.
> >
> >Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
> >
> >Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, " I hate quotations.
> >Tell me what you know".
> >
> >If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist
> >hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it effectively.
> >
> >Puns are for children, not for groan readers.
> >
> >Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
> >
> >Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
> >
> >Who needs rhetorical questions?
> >
> >Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
> >
> >Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
> >
> >If your havving trubble wiht you're speling, ewe mite fined a speling
> >chekker usefull. :p

[Shawn D.]

I'd add:

Edit your posts to eliminate the "> >" and broken returns when posting from multiply-forwarded emails. :p

[booker]

Me fail English? Thats unpossible!

[Tim in N FL]

Booker,
I love your avatars....
Turns out that my personality is most similar to Stewie's of the Family Guy....have you taken that quiz yet online? Victory is mine!

http://www.stanford.edu/~atd10/quizes/fgquiz.html

Also, remember the episode of the Simpsons when Ralph is typing on a Coleco Adam personal computer (the circa mid-80s machine with daisy-wheel printer) and turns to say "...I'm learnding!" I almost fell in the floor when he said that from laughing....great stuff!
Cheers,
Tim

[Edit by Tim in N FL on [TIME]1108760831[/TIME]]

[booker]

[QUOTE="Tim in N FL"]Booker,
I love your avatars....
Turns out that my personality is most similar to Stewie's of the Family Guy....have you taken that quiz yet online? Victory is mine!

http://www.stanford.edu/~atd10/quizes/fgquiz.html

Also, remember the episode of the Simpsons when Ralph is typing on a Coleco Adam personal computer (the circa mid-80s machine with daisy-wheel printer) and turns to say "...I'm learnding!" I almost fell in the floor when he said that from laughing....great stuff!
Cheers,
Tim

[Edit by Tim in N FL on [TIME]1108760831[/TIME]][/QUOTE]

Hehe.. That's a funny quiz. Apparently I'm Brian:



Re: the avatars, Thanks! This is my first "stolen" avatar. The others are Booker535 specialties.

Ralph is easily the funniest Simpson character, IMO. This one is priceless:

Viking

Love this one:

Restaurant

More Simpsons clips:

Clips




[Edit by booker535 on [TIME]1108761977[/TIME]]

[Tim in N FL]

Good stuff Booker....I wonder which Family Guy character our beloved "grammartician" (neologism...sorry), ShawnD, is most like ? Tell us ShawnD...

[spinedocab]

[QUOTE="Shawn D."]I'd add:

Edit your posts to eliminate the "> >" and broken returns when posting from multiply-forwarded emails. :p [/QUOTE]

I agree, but thought maybe they'd be good enough to act as "bullets".